You Keep Me Sane
For 8 years, Aileen and Julie have been each other's sounding board from opposite sides of the globe – Aileen in London and Julie in Melbourne.
They have navigated everything – motherhood, relationships, menopause, health, grief, and everything in between – through daily voice messages. These exchanges often became lifelines, and now they share that space with their listeners.
In You Keep Me Sane, Aileen and Julie hold honest conversations on life's challenges, growth, and connection. They lend an ear and share heartfelt insights, creating a space that allows both them, and you, to be human.
Listeners are encouraged to write in with their own experiences and topics, becoming part of the conversation that feels like a chat with close friends.
You Keep Me Sane
The Messy–Tidy Divide: It’s Not About Laziness | YKMS
Episode Overview
This week, we’re lifting the lid on one of life’s everyday divides: the messy vs tidy debate. But we’re not here to hand out gold stars for perfect homes or shame anyone for clutter. Instead, we’re exploring what lies beneath our habits: how our upbringing, nervous systems, and life stages shape the way we live in our spaces.
From coat hanger standoffs to emotional wiring, we share our completely opposite approaches to order (and chaos), the judgments we’ve faced, and the surprising science behind mess and creativity. Whether you’re the “everything in its place” type or someone who can happily ignore a pile on the stairs, this episode is all about understanding (and accepting) the way you’re built.
Key Discussion Points
- Opposite ends of the spectrum: Aileen’s comfort with chaos vs Julie’s need for order.
- Nervous system clues: Why some of us find calm in clutter and others feel anxious until everything is put away.
- Childhood influence: How emotional temperature at home can shape our relationship with tidiness.
- The science bit: Studies linking clutter to creativity, risk-taking, and even cortisol levels.
Listener Takeaways
- Being tidy doesn’t make you “better,” and being messy doesn’t mean you don’t care - it’s often about how you regulate and what feels safe.
- Your space can reflect your internal state, but it can also influence it.
- Talk openly if you live with your opposite - it’s about understanding, not winning.
- Give yourself permission to keep your home in a way that works for your stage of life and nervous system.
Links
We refer again to Lauren from Perfect Home Organisation - Aileen got her in to her home and Lauren was amazing!
👉Follow Lauren at @perfectspacehomeorganisation
👉Check out her Amazon shop + WhatsApp community via her website:
https://www.perfectspacehomeorganisation.com/
Join the Conversation
Where do you sit on the messy–tidy spectrum? Do you thrive in chaos or only relax in order? We’d love to hear how you navigate differences in your household. Drop us a DM or voice note and let us know.
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If you’re struggling, consider therapy with our paid partner BetterHelp. Visit https://betterhelp.com/youkeepmesane for a 10% discount on your first month of therapy.
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Links:
- Follow YKMS Podcast on IG @youkeepmesane.pod
- Follow YKMS on FB https://www.facebook.com/YouKeepMeSanePod
- Email us at hello@youkeepmesane.com
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Hosts: Aileen Harvey & Julie Fahy
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Disclaimer:
Remember, we’re two friends sharing our personal experiences and discussing everyday challenges. We’re not qualified coaches or therapists, and our content is for general information and supportive conversation only. If you need professional help, please seek advice from a licensed therapist.